きょうじん Kyoujin (myuutsuu) wrote,
きょうじん Kyoujin
myuutsuu

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Years go by fast.

This is just a thoughtful journal post, reminiscing and so forth. I haven't really posted many actual journals here in awhile. I can't believe that I made this LJ when I was like.. god, I think I was 16? lol. And I turn 24 in June, jeez.

It's amazing how fast the past five years have gone by, honestly. Some things seem like it was only yesterday, and hell.. I even sometimes wake up feeling like I'm back in my bed in North Carolina. In the past five years I've had some amazing experiences, and I've had some of the worst, life-changing experiences that I never encountered before. I made a lot of stupid mistakes that I wish I could correct, but I also wish I could improve on the good things that I've done. I've grown up a lot and I've become more mature. I've changed in a lot of ways, the way I act and hell.. even the way I dress (though I need to stop being such an expensive dresser.. >> Damn you, Express). I've lost good, old friends that I miss talking to. I've strengthened some of my existing friendships and also made new ones. I've been lied to, and I've lied to others. I went through a year and a half/two years of being addicted to opiates in order to block out pain from my migraines and other experiences. I lost my Z, which is still sitting on the farm in Indiana, not running. I've gained new experiences and knowledge through different jobs. I've improved on my art and musical skills, but I wish I had practiced and done a LOT more. I was saved by good friends, in turn also finally got me out on my own.. I just never would have thought I'd be living all the way on the west coast in Seattle. It's also amazing that in the past several years, I've only even touched alcohol once or twice.

Life has changed so much. I could go on and on, but I know I'm already rambling (and anyone who is actually reading this is probably confused as hell over my jumbled words). Overall, I've had good and bad experiences.. just like everyone else. I learned a lot from it, and in turn.. I think it made me a better, stronger person. I'm still not close to perfect, and of course I never will be perfect. But I'm still learning new things every day. There's things that I wish I could fix, or at least tie up loose ends. I'm sure some of them will improve though, like my parents who're going through problems of their own that I wish I could help with. But some things are out of my hands, and all I can do is keep on going.

What's going to happen for me over the next five years? Or one year? Or even tomorrow? I'm not sure.. but that makes it all the more exciting, doesn't it? I've got chances to go into the gaming industry, I've got chances to finally make it to college sometime this year. And no matter what happens, no matter what I have to go through, things are going to turn out great. And nothing, nor anyone is going to make that impossible for me.

Finally, I want to thank you all. Whether you've been around for me, or you couldn't be there.. it doesn't matter. Even if you've just read what I've had to say and/or stuck with me, thank you. Without you, without friends, I wouldn't have made it to where I am today.


<3 to you all. And here's to tomorrow. ;]
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